Vale la pena

I've been thinking for days about how to write what I am about to say. It has taken much time to process an event that happened this past weekend and today I am going to share with you in an attempt to seek your prayers.

First I'd like to share scripture with you:

Suffering for Doing Good
8Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. 9Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 10For,
"Whoever would love life
and see good days
must keep his tongue from evil
and his lips from deceitful speech.
11He must turn from evil and do good;
he must seek peace and pursue it.
12For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their prayer,
but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil."
13Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? 14But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. "Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened." 15But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, 16keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. 17It is better, if it is God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. 18For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit, 19through whom also he went and preached to the spirits in prison 20who disobeyed long ago when God waited patiently in the days of Noah while the ark was being built. In it only a few people, eight in all, were saved through water, 21and this water symbolizes baptism that now saves you also—not the removal of dirt from the body but the pledge of a good conscience toward God. It saves you by the resurrection of Jesus Christ, 22who has gone into heaven and is at God's right hand—with angels, authorities and powers in submission to him.

1 Peter 3:8-22 (New International Version)

We've asked for prayers many times for protection for our family. This has been a long-time prayer request. We live in a society where an armed guard is present at every bank, many grocery stores and even stores like Aldi or Big Lots. We have bars on our windows and doors and a high wall along our back patio topped with a thick roll of razor wire and broken glass. We have anti-theft devices on our vehicles and multiple locks on our doors.

We minister in cities where drugs, violence and theft are a way of life. The areas we serve in are known to be "bad areas." I once had a taxi driver tell me he normally would not go near Tejarcillos, but since I was a young women with my daughter (I had Isabelle with me), he'd take me because of why we were here and what we were doing(I had explained that we were missionaries and this was the area God had called us to). He was fearful that something might happen to us and warned me to consider the cost.

We have personally felt the effects of this type of society as well as have others on our team in the form of theft, damaged vehicles and even being threatened with a knife. Recently, even more so as, the violence in all three areas has dramatically increased.

Last week, a young man was killed near the homes of several Los Guido church leaders for his tennis shoes. The question in the front of my mind has been "Is a life worth no more than a pair of tennis shoes?"

Yesterday in a local newspaper, it was reported that a baby between the ages of 1 and 2 was shot and killed as his mother unknowingly walked into the crossfire of a shoot out while carrying him. A young life innocently taken and mother forever changed because of senseless violence.

Last weekend, I was with our three children along with other members of our team at the base of the Pines in Tejarcillos, as we witnessed a robbery at gunpoint not more than 3 feet from us. I praise God for his protection and that through his grace our children were virtually unaware of what was going on just a few feet from them.

The afternoon we witnessed the robbery, as we sat in the porch area of Pastor Rogelio's house, the question came up, "Is it worth it?" ("Vale la pena?") One church leader shared his strong feelings of anger at what he'd just seen, especially because he knew the two teenagers who committed the crime. He asked us to pray for him, as his former life used to be full of things of that sort and he never wants to fall into that life again, yet the anger inside him at what he sees on a daily basis, fights to take control.

1 Peter 3:9 stands out to me. "Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing."

Verse 11 says, "He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it."

"...Consider the cost..." the taxi driver warned me.

How easy it would be to try fight the crime we see, to strike back, to let our anger overcome the love Christ has placed in our hearts. How easy it would be to turn from La Carpio, Los Guido or Tejarcillos and never go back, believing the lie that God wants us to stay where we are safe and our children are protected. I thought it, believe me, I did. There is nothing I've ever seen that has rocked me to my knees more than this.

What a blessing verses 14 - 18 are. What a sweet reminder of the blessing we have in Christ Jesus. Again, I admit, pretty hard to choke down as well. Verse 14 says that those that suffer for what is right are blessed and then in verse 17 scripture says that it is better to be in the will of God, doing what is right, and suffering, than doing evil. Praise be to God that what we have seen and been through is on the far end of the suffering and persecution scale of many in this world.

Verse 18 puts it all into the right perspective. "For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit..." Jesus Christ died for the sins of all men, whether good or whether evil. Men (and women) who commit crimes all over the world, even the man that we saw commit the armed robbery the other day. Christ was put to death and his resurrection saves us from eternal condemnation and separation from an eternity with Him in heaven.

Alex reminded us of these scriptures Sunday as he preached in Los Guido and also of the story of the five missionaries who were brutally killed in Equador and about whom the book, The End of the Spear, was written. I read this book before we made the decision to come to Costa Rica to serve. I knew then, as I do now, that the cost of serving Christ is high. It is not to be taken lightly. The wives of those missionaries that were killed, later went back to the same village to live with the very men who had brutally killed their husbands. They lived in that village with their children and today, the entire village has come to know Jesus Christ as their personal Savior. Five lives were lost but so many more were gained for the Kingdom.

Luke 14:25-27 speaks of the cost of being a Disciple of Jesus Christ.

25Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: 26"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. 27And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple."

I remember reading this verse before we came to Costa Rica and even sharing it with my family, as a way of sharing with them what I believed to be God's call on my life. I still believe this to be true today and the call of our lives has not changed. God has still placed the call of taking the gospel to Costa Rica, specifically these three areas, and more like them all over the country.

I am shaken and, yes, scared. But 2 Timothy 1:7 says, "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline." Pastor Rogelio ends each of his prayer letters with this scripture and it is by the holy power of these words we must strive on. Matt and I have to be very aware and continually seeking wisdom from God about where and when to include our children in the daily ministry. But we also know that God did not call us here to minister without them. We know He has great lessons for them to learn as well.

I share all of this with you today, because while it is my desire to live only in the fear of the Lord, I sit here today, fearful of the safety of my husband and children, of Pastor Rogelio and his family, of our church leaders, of the youth, of the innocent children whose lives are affected and changed in unimaginable ways due to the extreme violence they witness every day, and of our team. I fear the feelings that may come into my heart if the violence reaches a higher, much more personal level. I cannot with absolute certainty, say I would have the strength to go back like those women did. My prayer is that I would choose to follow Christ, no matter what He asks of me, but my flesh is weak, and that would be a great test of my faith. You can pray for my heart to always be rooted in the strength and wisdom of Jesus.

We ask all of you faithful prayer partners to fall to your knees at the feet of Christ on the behalf of the churches in these areas, for the youth and young adults who fight a daily battle to resist the trap of a life of violence. Pray for them as they may, in their own house, witness unspeakable crime and violence. Pray they would seek to use the resources provided by our God as a means of escaping this cycle of life. Pray for the young children who are effected by this violence, who may lose fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles and others to this violence. Pray that God would use the churches to be a light in the darkness in these areas as they continue to take the gospel to all men. Pray for our team to make wise decisions and continually seek wisdom from the Lord. Pray we would seek His gudance and follow His path. Pray for our family as well.

My heart desires to live as 1 Peter 3:8 descibes, "Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble."

I am encouraged by 1 Peter 3:15. "But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have."

The hope in my heart comes from only from Jesus Christ and it is because of Him, and only Him, that I am here, that I go against what my mind tells me and continue to return to a place where someone might one day see something that I have or think I have something of value and take action to get it that may result in an injury or worse. At times, it is almost unbearable to think of things like this. However, in those moments, it is the Holy Spirit that graciously reminds me "How can you not, my precious child, when you know what HE did for you?"